“You two are disgusting,” Venus said, crossing her legs and sipping her juice box. “Get a room already.”

“Well it’s not my fault.” Ceasar’s face was red and he looked supremely uncomfortable as Ice nuzzled at his neck. “I keep telling him to stop but he won’t!”

Ice was grinning and clinging and idiotic, kissing up and down Ceasar’s neck and letting his lunch get cold. “But you’re gonna move in with me!” he exclaimed, “I’m so happy!”

Teddy rolled his eyes in a way that clearly said “You practically live together already, if the number of times I’ve been allowed in our dorm room the past couple months is any indication.” Teddy was very good at eye rolling, you understand.

“I already apologized for kicking you out of the room all the damn time, didn’t I? What more do you want? Here,” Ice pushed his tray across the table, “have my pudding and stop whining already.”

It was butterscotch pudding, so Teddy was satisfied.

Venus tucked her hair behind her ears. “I don’t care how happy you are,” she said, “stop necking in the cafeteria. It’s so gross.”

“No more gross than the two of you fussing over that overgrown kitten of yours,” Ice retaliated, to which TJ and Venus could only look at one another and blush. “That’s what I thought,” Ice said, and started nibbling Ceasar’s ear.


“Okay, okay,” Ice said, pulling away a little (though the two of them still managed to occupy no more than a single seat between them). “You guys are no fun at all.”

“Time, place, and occasion, you horny mutt,” Venus said. “None of those should be ‘while people are eating.'”

“Ceasar, she’s being so mean to me!”

“I’m not here,” Ceasar said, having long gone back to eating his tuna sandwich and pretending like he wasn’t sitting in Ice’s lap getting molested and definitely ignoring the fact that he liked it a hell of a lot. “I’m on the beach with my surfboard and a pina colada, and someone’s just pantsed PMSing boyfriend, and it is glorious.”

“So we should all go out tonight,” Ice said, completely changing the subject. “Let’s sneak off campus and go to a club. We’ll go somewhere they don’t know us so Venus can dress up.”

Venus perked up. “But what would I wear?” she asked.

“You can borrow one of my aunt’s dresses,” Ceasar said, “she won’t mind.”

“Let’s dress you up, too.” Ice held Ceasar’s hair in pigtails. “You’d make a cute girl!”

“Fuck you!” Across the table Teddy doubled over in laughter, and Venus patted him gently on the back. “Fuck you, too!”

“You could just wear some hairclips,” Venus suggested, “Mess with some peoples’ heads. I have starfish ones.”

Ceasar puffed out his cheeks. “I want dolphin ones,” he mumbled.

“Ah, well, I’m sure we could find some…”

“Ice!” Ceasar exclaimed as Ice took the lull in conversation to start gnawing on Ceasar’s neck again. He pushed Ice out of the chair.

Venus grinned a most satisfied grin as Ice fell to the ground with a sickening thud. “You’ll need some really girly jeans, too,” she said, “and high-heeled boots. Oh, this is going to be the best night ever! Can I bring a camera?”

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